Is it changing?

Many times, we find it convenient to do or to move restlessly rather than contemplating. If one does not want to be responsible, one can just be on the move or go without any deep thought or questioning one’s action consciously. Thinking or contemplation involves assuming responsibility for the situation one finds himself in ; it is purely a voluntary internal process.

Habitual action without thinking is irresponsible. Action based on too much thinking may be defensive.  Action based on clear contemplation with the inner, loving awareness will be the right action. Conscious action is action based on loving awareness (…need to contemplate on what this loving awareness is!).  Isn’t it called conscious living?

The initial days in this organisation were spent wondering if it was right to join this company. Then I found myself in the thick of things. My inner-self prodded me to go about contacting as many customers as possible. The quality of initial leads that came in – made CEO and the Director to notice me. My sustained efforts have brought in more inquiries. This consistency has obliterated my self-doubt and diffidence.

As on date, no major deals have been struck though. But no one pushes me for that either. My seniors are happy about the efforts itself.

Let us return to three obstacles.

CEO still continues avoiding taking any decisions. This will imply – if I take decisions, he would not object. This also implies that the CEO will not be of support when the decision goes awry. As long as I am on the firing line, the CEO will not mind me taking decisions.

VP’s intransigency is becoming more and more irrelevant. It is obvious that his competency levels are far less than what he tries to project. Only the official position has given some authority to him. Some days back one of the Cartel Member – The finance manager- visited the office. From the interactions, I understood he too is allergic towards VP’s behaviour and personality. On a particular administrative matter, the VP seemed to have behaved in a very arrogant fashion with him. In this regard, the Cartel Member complained to the (tea-drinking) Director. The director seems to have re-assured the Finance Manager of his secured place in the organisation and also gave out the impression that VP is being kept under watch.

The CEO is repeatedly asking me about any potential candidate who can be head-hunted from the industry for filling the VP’s post. So all is not well with VP’s own position in the company.

The Cartel – 3rd obstacle – is slowly but surely responding better nowadays. The finance Manager’s visit to the office and the time spent with him have broken ice with him to some extent. These days, the Production Manager keeps calling me on phone and voluntarily discussing pending things. He of course keeps mentioning that the conversations are off the record; he would still want me to come through VP for any official requests. At least, the unofficial avenue of communication is open.  QA Manager is still indifferent. B hardly communicates with me.

The slow response is something I may have to live with for ever, I think. Both the Cartel and the VP are lethargic. They need to pushed, cajoled and pressurised to elicit responses. This is not my preferred way of working. I normally expect voluntary and prompt responses from the team members. If it is not happening, it is better to accept the reality and adapt.

So do the 3 obstacles still exist? It may exist, but I sense it has now become diluted in its form now. This could become possible only because of my constant efforts to bring in more and more business inquiries without getting frustrated over the lack of response or the desired results. So if one accepts the reality instead of resisting it and goes about acting based on deep inner thinking (or Loving Awareness – what is this? I really should try to answer this), the reality could be changed. Is it changing for me?

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